Harsh Motivation for a Rough & Tough World Get Fuc-ing Real, Get Right! From Best Selling Self Help Author Chris Edwards of 90 Days to a Glass Half Full Lifestyle and 2 Hours Unplugged: Unplug & Reconnect
This book is also dedicated to some of my rough and tough formal co-workers in the trucking and distribution side of the business. Roslyn and Miranda cornered me one day and said, “I get it Chris, I get the positive thinking and the quotes but I need them real. They need grit or vulgarity to be real to me.”
So, Roslyn & Miranda and to the group that worked with you on the dock and in the trucks. This one is real and just for you. This one consists of a little humor, some vulgarities in wit, some quotes that will make you think and take action and other that may make you say WTF?
Thank you for the motivation to do a book with a little grit and to be real.
Enjoy, Chris Edwards, Napa California, Spring
Lesson 1
Put down the fu—ing phone, get off Facebook, stop with the Tweets. Quit making excuses and blaming all the dumb-as-es around you. Take a moment each day and take some responsibility for yourself. Open a book. Fu—ing read and realize that you can actually become something if you get your head out of your ass and actually educate yourself.
Now, a few of you asked me to be real with you so here it is. You have potential, but you are so stuck into the drama around you and just bitching about it rather than do something about it. You have the potential as you have been through a lot of shit. I know it, you know it and everyone that knows you, knows it. Hell, it may even be a miracle you are still alive and survived the shit in your past to get you here.
So now stop. Take 15 minutes each day aside and put a plan in place to get your shit together. You are a good person under that tough foul exterior.
You Get Fu–ing Real, Get Right! You want things and deserve a good life. So, take 15 minutes a day and let’s evaluate the day.
Begin the day by reading one of our daily quotes and put it into action. Some are actionable, some will just make you think. Others will make you go, WTF.
But here is the plan.
First put down the phone and put things in life in perspective.
• In 1900, <10% of families owned a stove, or had access to electricity or phones
• In 1915, <10% of families owned a car
• In 1930, <10% of families owned a refrigerator or clothes washer
• In 1945, <10% of families owned a clothes dryer or air-conditioning • In 1960, <10% of families owned a dishwasher or color TV
• In 1975, <10% of families owned a microwave in 1990,
Today, at least 90% of the country has a stove, electricity, car, fridge, clothes washer, air-conditioning, color TV, microwave, and cell phone. We are living in a faster paced world that is adopting the use of technology faster then ever before.
When you bitch about how bad your work or life is remember how your grandparents lived 50 years ago or your grand parents before them.
Remember what life was like for you when Get Fu–ing Real, Get Right! You were either incarcerated, or in the streets or involved with drugs, or in an abusive relationship or just totally miserable.
There is always hope if we give a fuc- to recognize it. So “unplug” for a few minutes and work with me to work with you through the book or podcast before us.
Now here is the shitter of how that phone is impacting us and we don’t even see it. People don’t want to put down their phones to focus or even read this book or listen to an educational podcast. I see it everywhere…
• Young couples out to dinner pull out their smartphones to check messages, emails and social networks even before scanning the menu, and check their phones repeatedly throughout the meal.
• Shoppers and commuters standing in line, people crossing busy streets, even cyclists and drivers whose eyes are on their phones instead of their surroundings. (I recently got into an discussion online via an app Facebook), with a member of the Napa City Council; Doris, who suggested “making cell phone usage on the downtown sidewalks illegal.” I expressed my frustration in her comment, but I do empathize with where she was coming from in the dialog of people being distracted. (However, as much as we want to, we cannot legislate common sense.)
• Toddlers in strollers playing with a smart-phone instead of observing and learning from the world around them. (And, we wonder what contributes to Attention Deficit Disorder?)Get Fu–ing Real, Get Right!
• People driving down the street with eyes on their phones, texting or playing apps, nearly bumping into other cars and running off the road or over curbs or crashing into obstacles.
There is an argument that the access to digital technology bombarding us and beginning at ever-younger ages, is transforming modern society. The transformation may be in ways that can have negative effects on physical and mental health, neurological development and personal relationships. Or as some suggest they are making us Zombies, driving our brains to mush and in a loss of true human interaction or true connections.
Have we forgot how to “unplug” meaning put the phone on sleep mode or (gosh forbid), turn it off? Have we actually forgot how to go for a walk with a dog, meet and actually chat with friends, acquaintances and strangers while being unplugged?
Can we do it without feeling anxious?
As with everything in life, moderation in the use of our smart-phone should be the hallmark of a healthy interaction with technology.
Too many of us have become slaves to the devise that was supposed to free us, connect us and give us more time; to experience life and the people we love. Instead, we’re constantly bombarded by bells, buzzes and chimes that alert us to messages that we feel compelled to view and respond to immediately.
We get anxious with every ding or chime. A 2015 study released by Deloitte found that Americans collectively check their smart-phones upwards of 8 billion times per day. That means we as individuals check at least 59 times per day, to check emails, text or those Facebook Likes, those amazing Tweets or the most recent Instagram cat photos.
More disturbing trends Deloitte also found that ….
• 81% of Americans spend time looking at their phones while dining out in restaurants.
• 26% of those in the 18-24 age range said they look at their phones immediately upon waking up.
So have you replaced your addiction to drugs, alcohol, porn, cigarettes or whatever with cell phone overdrive. You bet your sweet ass you are getting close.
Let’s look at the signs.
In an article for Health & Trends, Signs & Symptoms of Mobile Phone Addiction and How to deal with it? By Deepak Kumar September 5, 2015; we learn the signs of Smart-phone App Addiction… 20 Signs and Symptoms of Mobile Phone Addiction:
• You keep your phone in your hand all the time remains in your hand more rather than in your pocket or bag. • You get tensed when your phone goes out of your site.
• You spend more time on watching the mobile phone screen rather than any other activity.
• Your phone battery rarely lasts for a day.
• The very first thing you check while leaving any place is your phone. • You even take your phone to the bathroom.
• You keep on checking mobile notifications even when there aren’t any.
• Your day starts with checking notifications on your mobile phones and it ends in the same way.
• The mobile phone is the first thing you look out for just after waking up and you keep your phone near the pillow while sleeping.
• You feel a constant urge to just check whether your phone is with you or not. • You feel like your phone is vibrating even when it isn’t.
• You care for your phone more than your life or anything else in the world.
• Even the thought of losing or misplacing phone scares the hell out of you.
• You carry an extra battery or your charger/power bank with you all the time so that you never run out of battery while using your phone.
• You just unlock and lock your phone time to time without any need.
• Even a small scratch on your phone or a crack on display hurts you a lot.
• You have almost each and every app on your phone and you keep your phone much more organized then your cupboard, desk or bedroom.
• In a group meeting or even at your work station, you are the first to pick the phone out from a pocket and last to keep it back.
• You are constantly scolded by your loved ones or your boss for your growing closeness to your smart-phone.
• You are fighting the work no cell phone policy while on the work floor.
• You are ready to live alone only on the condition that you have your smart-phone with you.
Almost everyone I know, shows some of the signs, above. Does that mean they are a smart-phone addict? Not necessarily. Is Smart-phone addiction real? Yes, it is real.
According to Psychguides.com, An American Addiction Center Resource; Cell phone addiction, sometimes referred to as problematic mobile phone use, is a behavioral addiction thought to be similar to that of an Internet, gambling, shopping, or video game addiction and leads to severe impairment or distress in one’s life.
Their resource article continues: “In a study conducted by Baylor University, cell phone addiction was linked to:
•Impulsiveness and materialism.
•A preoccupation with material objects as opposed to intellectual, spiritual, or cultural values.
•The obsessive use of a smart-phone has been compared to that of credit card misuse and compulsive buying.
Smart-phones have become a representation of social status and thus, there is pressure to own the newest release and to have all of the best applications. People suffering from this condition often times have what has been coined “nomophobia,” or the fear of being without one’s cell phone. Problematic cell phone users can develop a social media addiction as well, which has a number of harmful effects on the user, such as:
•Impaired self-esteem.
•Impaired work performance.
•Interpersonal conflicts.
With the widespread accessibility of cell phones at a younger age now, teenagers are especially prone to developing an addiction to their cell phones or social media. Whether you or a loved one suffers from a cell phone addiction, there is hope for recovery and resources available.
Refer to the website Psychguides.com, for further resources. This book, nor my tamer one: 2 Hours Unplugged: Unplug & Reconnect, is not an indictment of Smart Phones, how you fuc-ing use them; nor apps nor about overcoming addiction.
This is not a treatment plan but a recommended lifestyle recommendation. So put down the damn phone and pay attention to yourself and the real people around you.
These lessons paired with those 90 Days to a Glass Half Full Lifestyle which is less blunt, serves as a reminder to “unplug or disconnect” and to “reconnect to those around you. Quit, being a Zombie or a slave to the smart-phone devise and its apps. Participate again, even if just for 2 hours a day, and enjoy those and the wonders of the life around you. The premise of these idea and those that follow in other posts, podcasts and the book series is for you to get real with yourself, unplug or disconnect from the smart-phone gadget, so that you may re-plug or reconnect yourself into the present joy of living!
Now put it down and let’s live a life in the present!
Author Chris Edwards speaks around the country on disconnecting and being present in daily living. To find out more about him and his lessons visit 2ndlifemedia.com
Chris Edwards Author, Mentor/Executive Coach & Political Consultant 